1.  Let the reader SEE the scene.  In other words, show don’t tell.  I know you’ve heard these words over and over.  But let me give you an example.  In my novel Tessa and Claudine, Tessa is in the hospital and her Dad shows up.  Sounds fairly normal, right?  But it isn’t because she’s sixteen and hasn’t seen her dad since she was a toddler.  Her parents are divorced.  She’s a mess after an accident, and she;s shocked when he comes to visit her.  He’s about to leave, and I jump in and tell the reader why he’s leaving.    It turns out that this is a bad move.  I need to let the reader see the scene instead.  It’s better to  show the action, indicate just what the Dad is doing at this point  — after all he has to feel uncomfortable around her.

2.  Next tip.  Do not undermine the tension.  Okay, now I have a tense scene going.  Tessa’s Dad has just left her hospital room, and she hears a loud commotion in the hallway.  It’s her mother yelling and screaming her head off at her dad for coming to see the daughter he barely knows.  I slow the story down by throwing in a line about how the nurses tell her mother to keep her voice down.  (My workshop leader says NO, don’t do that, “It undermines the tension.”)    The  mother needs to walk into Tessa’s hospital room as if the confrontation with her dad never happened.  Great advice, I think.

I’m learning a lot by having my work critiqued and by listening to the critiques of others.  Stop in after my July workshop for more  tips.

Right now I’m spending hours revising my novel, but hey, it keeps me out of trouble.  It’s good and hot here in Savannah, but I love it.  I think those summers  growing up in Southern Illinois without any air conditioning prepared me for the hot, humid South.  

Happy writing to one and all.  And safe travels if you are hitting the road this summer.

Lisbeth

TESSA AND CLAUDINE – REVISION TIPS:  I’m rolling along with my novel, revising each chapter, making sure the reader can see the scene, and cutting out parts.  I may like a certain paragraph, or scene, but I ask, “Does this relate to the  overall story?”  If the answer is no, then no matter how well it’s written, I push the delte button.  It hurts, but it has to go.  I remember a writing instructor saying, “If you’re writing about an Indian, then everything you write must in some way relate to the Indian.”

I’m sharing chapters with a cousin who’s writing a memoir.  We read and critique.  It works well.  She catches things I can’t see.  I recommend this type of back and forth critiquing with one person you trust to do a good critique.  Sometimes we get too close to our work that we can’t see the small mistakes.  Knowng my cousin is going to want to touch, taste, see and feel what is going on is helping me to make sure I appeal to the senses.

On the cruise, I saw lot of families.  I visited with sisters traveling together.   Often the sisters seemed so different in personality, but there they were laughing, singing, having a great time together.  It gave me hope that I could get my two characters back in touch with one another.   

My sister, Charlotte, and I had our many differences, but we both liked to cook.  She loved my chicken enchiladas.  I’m going to add that recipe today.   Let me know if you like it.  (Look under Recipes for the chicken enchilada recipe.)

Any other Cayamo fans out there?

Here’s the deal:  I reread a chapter on the computer.  What I’m doing is changing the tense from past to present and also tightening.  As I read, I ask myself — does this scene move the story forward.  If the answer is no, I delete it.   Since I’ve decided to put the whole book in present tense, instead of past, I pay close attention to the verbs and make tense changes.  And then I record the whole chapter on a tape recorder.

I got this idea after reading a newspaper article in which authors were interviewed about writing techiniques.  If I hesitate while reading my words, it tells me that the sentence doesn’t flow well.  I stop and make changes.  I find that while reading, I often automatically change the sentence to something that sounds more natural.  I catch spelling errors working this way and also find words that still the tense change.   Overall, this system of revision has me pretty excited.  Try it.  You might like it.

Have you got any writing tips for me?  Any new writing books you love?  I saw a book advertised by James Alexander Thom, on Writing Historical Fiction that sounded good.  No, he’s not a relative. We just happen to share the same last name.

If you are looking for some good recipes, check out Samantha Matthews website:  www.diggfood.com   She wrote me a note this week, and I loved her recipes. 

Stay warm. The winter weather is upon us.  Lisbeth

TESSA AND CLAUDINE:  Tessa is bummed out in chapter three.  She’s in the hospital after a car accident.  Her sister, Claudine, comes to visit, as does her boyfriend, Ben.  Claudine has the nerve to flirt with Ben in Tessa’s hospital room and leaves minutes after Ben makes his exit.  Tessa is sure Claudine’s chasing after him.   Not only is Tessa a bruised, banged up mess.  Now, her sister is after her boyfriend.  Can things get worse?  Count on it.

ECHOES:   The reviews for the poetry book my granddaughter, Rachel, and I collaborated on, are positive.  We are pleased to say the least.  Readers love the concept of our parallel poems.  A teacher friend is using our poetry book as a  teaching tool for her poetry unit.  My sister Deb ordered a copy for her school library, which is great.  I hope to get it in a lot of schools.  I’m out on the marketing trail.  Today I took an ECHOES press release to a local magazine hoping they will publish an article.

It’s rather chilly in Savannah as I know it is in many parts of the country.  It’s time to read some good books, get some exercise, and make some of that yummy soup.

If you try out the soup, let me know if it’s a big hit.

Lisbeth

It’s time to introduce you to ECHOES

Here is the blurb I helped write for the catalog description for the American Library Association conference which will be held next June:   “From a grandmother – granddaughter tandem comes a poetry book, ECHOES, authored by Lisbeth Thom and her granddaughter, Rachel Nelson. This collection presents a collaboration of parallel poems, written on similar subjects.  Both spent the summer bouncing poems back and forth, turning their dream of creating a book together into a reality.  Enjoy their poetic banter and differing thoughts on life in this unusual book.”

Rachel and I kept our poetry book a secret  so we could give it as a Christmas gift.  We had such fun over the summer working on our project.  I love writing poetry and now that I am back working on TESSA AND CLAUDINE, I still find time to take a break and work on poems.

I’ve recently written several poems that relate to stay at home moms and plan to continue that trend.   My next poetry book maybe titled STAY AT HOME MOMS.   For years, I kept a journal, and now looking back through those journals gives me ideas.  Sometimes all I have to do is let those memories fall off the shelf.  After all, those days of staying home with small children are still vivid in my mind.  I well remember those days.  I had three little ones under the age of four.  I had to remind myself not to have negative thoughts about things I could not control.  Instead I tried to focus  my energy on the positive present moment.  THAT DID NOT ALWAYS WORK…. sometimes I whined.  I tried to keep a smile on my face or at least stick my face in a book as often as possible.  I kept an open book in every room in the house.  That was my escape.  Like,  go ahead and have a temper tantrum.  I am going to the Trevi fountain with…

I often get reminders of those fun and frustrating days from reading blogs about moms who write.  Kate Hopper, a young mother, teacher, and writer has a great  blog. Check it out at:  www.motherswhowrite.blogspot.com

Let me hear from you other writers, poets, and moms out there.

Happy writing.   Lisbeth

I’ve been busy reworking my novel in first person, present tense, and it sounds more natural.  The good news is my characters are happy with me.   I hated that guilty feeling when they were sitting across the room, breathing down my neck.  Now, they come with me to holiday parties, to church, out to dinner, shopping, on walks, into the bathtub.   We ‘re back in synch — they march around in my head giving me tips on what they would like to do or NOT do next.  Tessa, my main character, had the nerve to ask me what I got her for Christmas.   I told her to simmer down.  What I got her was a new lease on life.  I put her back in action, as if that wasn’t enough.  She acts like a goody two-shoes.  But, I can assure you, she is not all perfume and roses.  Like everyone else, she has her devious moments.  Everyone knows her older sister, Claudine, has a bit of the devil in her, but Tessa puts on this nice-girl front.

As many a writing instructor has told me, a character cannot be all good or all bad.  Everyone is made up of a little of both.   That’s always a good thing to remember.  My sister used to be the one who got in the most trouble.  She argued with my mom a lot, which got her in  hot water.  As for me, I often behaved poorly, but didn’t talk back.   Acting innocent saved my skin.  Mouthy Charlotte often got blamed.  (Sorry Charlotte.)

Here’s hoping all of you have a blessed Christmas.  I wish  you peace and joy in the coming New Year.  I’ll check back in with a report after we return from Minnesota.

Do you have sister stories to share?  Did you let your sister take the blame?  Feel like confessing?